Sunday, 2 December 2007

Don't Make Me Mad, grrrrrr!

Monkeypipe is in the process of dismantling and rebuilding himself. With the impending arrival of Pipe Jr, it’s important for me not to imprint all the past errors of every generation of Monkeypipe that has gone before me. At present though, the main realisation has been that Monkeypipe has a lot of anger in him. Anger that sits somewhere between his diaphragm and his stomach, that churns and spins and cripples him – anger that really isn’t helping anyone and doesn’t need to be there.

And so here we are, at stage one of the clear out. As a busy Monkey these last few weeks/months, the posting here has dwindled somewhat. I will later be going down that route of listing things – best of’s for the year and so on, but for now, let’s start with some of those things that make me angry.

Let’s start simple, like phones. I get that the compression rates of the sound on a phone exist to enable high speed and high volume connections, or something like that, but why do people talk so bloody loudly into them? But that’s boring, that’s more an issue with my sensitivity of hearing than phones themselves. In this day and age of voicemail and a million and one ways of leaving a message – why on earth should anyone still hear the engaged tone? But more than that, why on earth would anyone answer their phone only to tell you that they are too busy and can’t talk? Why not screen the call? How about people not leaving a message when they phone if it’s a number you won’t recognise? Or just people in general?

Okay, that’s going off on a tangent – what’s with all the alpha-male crap on the street nowadays? Why walk towards people and bump into them rather than shifting your shoulder width a centimetre or two? Or walking more than two abreast in the street, but not getting out of the way, because it’s more important to keep that line going? Or walking in that same line really slowly in front of people?

How about combining the walking and the phones. Walking along and texting is stupid, but hey, sometimes you have to do it, I’m sure. But when you are doing it, why hold the phone at your waist height? Is it that bloody heavy? Why not hold it up high so that you can send or read your message, but still use your peripheral vision to see if you are about to walk into someone or something? In fact, while on the subject, standing in front of the tube doors and not pushing to get on is as unhelpful to those people getting off as pushing to get on.

But the real reason for this post isn’t about moaning, it’s trying to highlight how pathetic being angry at anything is when you apply your mind to it. Why get angry at people when living in a big, highly populated and very crowded city? How about driving and then getting angry at other cars in front of you? What do you expect? If you’re angry because you’re going to be late, then why not leave ten minutes earlier? But I’m getting angry thinking about it again.

I don’t want to be angry, it makes me feel bad. It creates bad energy. It is unhelpful and clouds your abilities. You don’t believe me? Start doing a simple task – something repetitive that requires a level of concentration. Half way through the task think about a thing or person that makes you angry, then see how many errors you start to make.

I don’t want to be angry, but not feeling is no better – without getting too tofu-muncher here, I want to feel, and live and experience, and own those feelings that are part of me, all parts of me – good and bad – but not be owned by them, or have them control me.

Anyway – this is a poor post – but hey, I’m finding it hard to concentrate – Mrs the Ball is on the phone, talking so very loudly…

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